In Shadow
by PriestessAmy
Summary: The guys didn't make it and everyone is at fault. Picking up the pieces won't be easy. This one's going to be a slow burn.
1. The End

She killed him.

Granted, it's not like she shoved him off the crumbling tower herself. But Emily was at least self-aware enough to realize that what happened to Matt intrinsically had a lot to do with her actions as a person. Always a princess, always a damsel, always needing help. But as she ran the scenario over and over in her mind in the coming weeks, she could find no way to deny the truth: if Matt hadn't been so resolute in saving her, he wouldn't have plummeted into that mine and been killed.

As if she didn't already hate herself enough for causing Hannah and Beth to die. Now she had another death on her hands. And since Em was basically the most stubborn bitch on the face of the earth, she wasn't going to let anyone tell her different. Clearly she had a lot to learn about how to be a decent human being, so this would be her cross to bear. Then, some day, she could find some degree of solace. But for now, nobody was happy with this.

* * *

She killed him.

Ashley hadn't meant to freeze like she did. After all, she just had to throw open the door, let Chris inside, and shut it after him. But the monster must have been right on his heels, and her body refused to act. Which instead meant watching in horror as the beast murdered him and probably dragged his corpse off to whatever hole it crawled out of to save its meal.

For all that everyone seemed to think she was a good person, Ash couldn't really deny why it happened. Underneath whirring saw blades, they half-confessed what they felt for one another, and she told Chris to shoot her. But it wasn't until that gun clicked uselessly in her direction that she realized how little she had meant that gesture. And you couldn't take that sort of thing back! So she just... tagged along, feeling herself getting more and more frustrated with Chris as time went on. But she couldn't get over her own bullshit and now Chris was dead because of her. Nobody was happy with this.

* * *

She killed him.

At the time, there were about fifty details that made no sense. But once she managed to get the facts straight, Jessica found it all pretty hard to believe. She had missed out on most of the adventure, and she could never really be sure whether she ought to be jealous or grateful for that. But in her effort to get the hell out of the mines and back to the cabin, she saw one of those things snag Josh and squeeze his head like a melon. It was horrifying, and even the mere sound of it through eyes shut tight made her ill. But to learn after-the-fact that it was Hannah was...

Dammit, Jess was just a party girl! She wasn't supposed to be one of those people who was sad all the time and thought about everything way too much. That kinda stuff was for everyone else – Sam and Em and Ash, they did all that really well. But the second that Hannah, or one of her gross-ass friends or whatever, grabbed her by the hair and dragged her through the woods, something about Jess had changed. The guys might not have made it, but she was still alive. Nobody was happy with this.

* * *

She killed him.

There was nothing metaphorical or tangential about it. Sam panicked, because you can only be screamed at by a hellbeast so many times before the tension breaks you. She ran for the door and hit the switch, and it was only in the aftermath of the explosion that she knew something was amiss. Ash and Em were accounted for, and if the gods had any kindness in them at all Jess or Matt might turn up eventually. But Mike didn't make it. He was blown right the hell up. "I thought he would follow..."

The idiot was supposed to be right on her heels! The two of them had been playing hero all night, the least he could do was have the goddamn decency to live after everything he went through. But Sam was exhausted and all she could do was collapse back and rest in the snow, pretending it wasn't freezing the shit out of her as the sound of a helicopter hit her ears. Eight of them had come to this godforsaken shitheap of a mountain and barely half that was going back down. They had some very awkward funerals to look forward to when they got home. Everyone had screwed up and nobody was happy with this.


	2. The Beginning

Funerals were, in theory, meant to be times during which you said goodbye to those that had died and to gain some sense of peace about their passing. But four funerals later and Sam was fairly certain that she felt anything but peaceful. As near as she could tell, the other girls were having the same problem. No matter how many times they were offered seats up at the front, no one was eager to get in the hot-seat. Even if no one ever thought a single thing about it, that didn't change the fact that they had all collectively had a hand in the deaths of six different people. At least they were able to pass it off as intense grieving that they didn't want to put on display.

Attending four funerals in such a short span of time was exhausting, particularly when you felt like you were being blamed the entire time. Sam at least managed to look remorseful most of the time. Poor Ashley was a complete and total mess, and there was a lot of sobbing from her on behalf of all their friends. Emily had her usual sour look, but Sam caught her once or twice with tears in her eyes too. Only Jessica, surprisingly, remained completely stone-faced and stoic. That was odd for her, and further evidence that something was seriously wrong. But she refused to talk about it, and that very well might continue until someone really pressed her on it. But such things had to happen carefully.

Josh's funeral was the last and the most difficult. Not a one of them wanted to look those people in the eyes and see whatever emotions lay there – whether it was sadness or hatred or just a need to know the full story, a story that they could never tell them. They spent exactly five minutes at the reception to speak to them, and it was exactly as awkward as everyone feared it would be. With that obligation done, they were able to sneak away to Sam's dorm for some alcohol, because goddamn did they all need a drink.

Sam handed everyone a beer before collapsing on her bed with a groan. "I feel awful. Are we bad people?"

"I'm pretty sure we're the worst..." Ashley agreed with a solemn nod, flopping next to her.

"No," piped up Jess with surprising assurance. She took her place at the other end of the bed, propped up against the wall. "No, we're not bad people. Just... scared, right? Like, and who could blame us? Some really terrible things happened and the fact that we're even alive is like... woah. Let's face it, the guys would want us to 'party like porn stars' yeah? So... whatever."

Emily kept right on lacking empathy as usual and huffed softly. "Says the girl who hasn't smiled once since we got back. How are we supposed to party when we don't even feel like getting out of bed?"

As if to give her answer, Jessica took a large drink from her bottle, setting it down with something resembling growl. "Fine, you can let the existential fear of the unknown force you to hide in your dorm for the rest of forever. But whether it's wendigos or Nessie or the inevitable heat-death of the universe... we have to keep going. Life sucks, we're all gonna die, let's drink."

Sam had to admit, Jess really had changed, and it was impossible to tell whether it was for the better or the worse. She still had a certain nature to her, but it was like she had gone from emphatically bright to emphatically dark. But either way, she was still emphatic. It was admirable, almost. "Well, the message might be a little... down. But I think Jess is right." Sam showed her support by taking a swig of her own drink.

"Okay" replied Em, in that voice that said that this was most definitely not 'okay' yet. "Okay, I'll join the revelry. But only if you," here she pointed at Sam, then to Jess, "and you, and I, all have a nice chat about one specific fucked up thing. Namely, the fate of Michael, whom Sam killed~"

Ashley finally spoke up, glaring across the room at Emily. Even now, she clearly hadn't learned her lesson. Or at least it certainly didn't seem that way. "Do we really have to do this right now? It seems like poor timing..."

"It's always going to be poor timing. It's kind of an awkward topic. So I say let's just fucking get it over with!" She leaned back and eyed everyone curiously with that same usual detached glare of hers. "If we don't get to it, we'll just keep putting it off and putting it off until we explode or implode or something."

Sam's hand tightened around her bottle of beer slightly, an exhale passing her lips. She was trying hard to keep herself focused and centered since there was probably no escaping this. She wished Jess would go back to her old self so she could actually read her face. Instead, it was just this stone wall giving her absolutely nothing. "I want to be able to say something meaningful here. Or to tell you about it in a way that would feel alright. But it was a... mistake. Pure and simple. I thought he was right behind me when the house blew... I-I mean when... _I blew up_ the house. And he wasn't."

So. Sam had kind of expected that she would look back and see Jessica's face unchanged. But instead, something in the girl had apparently cracked. Because now the poor thing was sniffling and sobbing and wiping at her eyes and Sam had to rush to get her some tissues. "I-I-I-I miss him so muuuccchhhh..." She unceremoniously blew her nose before gracelessly collapsing against Ashley.

For her part, Ashley showed a great deal of patience and understanding. Almost immediately she was wrapping an arm around Jess' shoulder and hugging her gently, then stealing a tissue for herself from the box. "Chris... We had only just... And that asshole Josh actually... got what he wanted... A-And-And... I was just so bitter. About him 'shooting' me, which is to say doing what I had freaking told him to! So I-I just stood there." And now both of them were sobbing and it might have almost been moving if it weren't so goddamn heartbreaking.

To Sam's surprise, it was Emily that came forward next. "I'm sorry... I don't think I actually learned anything. I'm still a total bitch. And it's because of it that Matt ended u-..." Just like the others, she was cut off by a dramatic choking sob. "I just... wanted us to think about talking. But I had to be an asshole." Sam watched in some combination of sadness and fascination as Emily began to laugh softly before shifting over so she could sit with everyone else on the bed. They joined together in lightly clinking their beer bottles together, all alternating between laughter and tears.

Finally she spoke up herself after getting another sip of her beer. "I think we're gonna have to settle for just partying like trauma survivors..."

There was more to be said, a lot more, after that. A great deal of apologizing – both for things that happened at the mountain and before – but also a lot of general conversation. After all, nobody had really decompressed about what happened that night, not only about the horrors but also just the night in general, even the brief moments of levity, dumb jokes and stupid pranks.

The next thing Sam knew, she was waking up with three other girls on top of her, all of them lightly snoozing. It was a moment of confusion and panic as she tried to decide what to do. Because this wasn't terrible, it was maybe even kind of nice. Ashley looked calm, Jessica finally looked happy, and even Emily's sneer was replaced with a face of contentment.

But she didn't want anyone else waking up in _the lesbian girl_ 's bed. It had never exactly been a huge problem that she and Beth had a kind of on-again, off-again _thing_. But at a moment like this, it seemed to be the sort of thing that might create some new tensions. She gently shook each of them in turn with a little chuckle. "Hey, losers, this bed is tiny and you're crushing me." They started to stir, Ashley dragging Jessica away with a promise to make sure she got into bed safely.

To Sam's surprise, Emily didn't seem to be going anywhere. At least the other two left without trying to put too much emphasis on this moment. Only when the room was silent again did Em try to explain herself. "Finally opening up was good. But it also made me, like, painfully aware of how little I want to go to an empty bed tonight. And you're... warm. And, y'know... nice and whatever. But you can tell me to go if you want."

Prior to this moment, Sam had often wondered exactly what it was that made people fall for Emily. But then the girl made these amazing puppy dog eyes at her, and it was basically impossible to say no. The both of them took the briefest of breaks to get changed into some pajamas before returning to Sam's bed. Things had been stressful for a while, and they had a long day, and it took no time at all to pass out.


	3. The Trouble

It had initially been a surprising development when Ashley turned up for her first day of work in the campus theatre shop to find Jessica there in paint-stained jeans and t-shirt excitedly, if unskillfully, operating a screwgun to secure a piece of scenery in place. As it turned out, while their classes didn't really overlap, both of them were drama majors – Ashley for the technical side of things, Jessica for the acting and talent stuff. Majors were encouraged to help with dirty work for all the plays since it kept you humble and built character and all that stuff. And both girls were at least competent at things like building simple set pieces or painting.

Shop days became a kind of low-key bonding session for them, something that almost no one else really knew about. Normally, Ashley looked forward to it, and it seemed like Jessica honestly did too on occasion. But today, not so much. Because a few days ago, after Josh's funeral and the big tragic heart-to-heart...

Well, she had only intended to get Jessica back to her room, and then she could go collapse in her own bed. But Ashley had barely even managed to turn away before she felt Jess' hand clamp around her wrist with a slight tug. "W-Wait. Would you mind... just hanging out for a little while? We all kinda opened the floodgates tonight and now I'm super on-edge." Which was how Ashley found herself spending a kind of embarrassingly nice night in Jessica's bed. Not that anything really happened, not even a little bit. But somehow the fact that it didn't, and the fact that some part of her wanted it, was what really scared her.

How long had it been since that awful night on Blackwood Mountain? How many times did Chris call out her name before he was decapitated? How many people had she already caught whispering about herself and the other girls? Things had gotten weird and now they were threatening to only get weirder over time. She wasn't helping the situation by trying to immediately replace one stupid crush with new stupider feelings.

So when the next shop day came around, Ashley wasn't exactly eager to get to work. Unfortunately, Jessica was, bounding over to her and thrusting a paint brush in her face. It seemed that she had found her bubbly nature again, at least enough of it to power through her days. "Come on, nerd, we have painting to do." She might have preferred going to work on something else, but with the next production coming up, there wasn't really anything else going on except painting the constructed stage.

Ash smiled wearily, unable to resist that grin (and frankly, she was grateful that it was back at all), and took the paintbrush from her, starting to help apply paint to the nearest wooden surface. "And hey, thanks again for putting up with my bullshit the other night. That was some real, like, sisterhood kinda stuff. I might have been a mess otherwise. Em was - and I can't believe I'm saying this - kind of right. Even if we did all end up crying like a bunch of babies." She laughed brightly, and the sound was so beautiful in light of how hurt and sad Jessica had been looking lately.

Ashley drew her paint brush along the surface, back and forth in slow, easy strokes. It was a bit hypnotic, and helped calm her, in a way. "It really was kinda nice. It's been tough, since we got back. And I'm pretty sure the last thing that any of us need is to have further problems from within." Ashley's brush dipped back down to get more paint before resuming painting.

"No! Well, I mean, yes. All that stuff too. But I was more specifically thinking about the fact that you were willing to stick around in my room so I didn't get lonely and stuff. That was really cool, and I would have understood if you refused." Jessica chuckled so amiably, which was awkward for Ashley considering she felt like a complete weirdo at the moment for having such mixed thoughts about it all.

Not like she could just inject that nugget of anxiety into the conversation without making Jess feel creeped. So she would just have to keep carrying on like she was totally normal. "Yeah, of course! Look, I know all of us have some issues. And... it only seems fair that we maybe promise to be there for one another. Besides, I've been getting... looks ever since we got back. And I'm really starting to worry that some of our friends might be distancing themselves from us. Like we're..." For a moment, her paintbrush halted and a sad sigh escaped her lips.

 _Ah yes, let's take a moment to forget our guilt over a silly little crush so we can focus on the much bigger guilt over, what was it now, oh right, killing Chris!_

Ashley was suddenly aware of two sensations at once – first, of small tears pricking the corners of her eyes, then second, Jessica's hand laying gently on her shoulder. She glanced over at her and saw that winning smile that could brighten up the room and gave a sort-of combined sniffle-laugh. "You're right. We need each other..." Ashley smiled a little brighter now, blushing, before turning back to continue painting.

/

Ashley bit into her sandwich and chewed on it thoughtfully, looking across the dining hall table at Sam who was presently doing the same. "So um... yeah, I went to drop her off, and instead I ended up staying with her all night. It was kind of a weird day. It was a **really** weird day. But I think it was necessary. Things almost feel like they're a tiny bit normal again."

Dear, sweet Sam just looked so amused by what Ash had said, obviously taking it all the wrong way. "Ahhh, cool cool. And it was comfy? Jessica's bed? Comfy-cozy and warm? Cool. Cool." Dammit, Ashley wanted to slap that smile right off her face. Even if it was kinda nice to see her friend being weirdly supportive.

"No, it's not... I mean, we're not-"

"Gay? I never said you were. But forget about labels and stuff, right? Just focus on the good. We could be at one another's throats, but instead we're friends again and everything is kinda... fluffy and nice." Here, Sam hesitated and started to look quite bashful. "Fooorrrr example. Like you, I ended up sharing my bed with Em. And. She kinda... kissed me."

Ashley's eyes widened, and for a moment she felt a deep sense of jealousy. "Come again?"


	4. The Thing

Emily winced as Jessica gave an almost immediate and visceral reaction. "You did **what**?"

"Bitch would you keep it down?"

Jessica stared at her in disbelief before sighing and leaning back against the house, sipping at her red Solo cup. "Chill, it's not like anybody wants to be around us anymore. Haven't you heard? We're _black widows_. Now let's rewind so you can properly explain to me what the hell happened."

Duh, of course Emily had just been deflecting, and she even kind of regretted relying on calling Jessica a bitch like that. She released a long, drawn-out sigh and sipped at her own beer. "So... Ugh, okay, so I'm there and I'm being woken up, and pretty much the only time anyone is waking me up while simultaneously laying in bed with me is when it's someone I'm dating. And my brain just goes straight for the obvious conditioning I've put it through. I say 'good morning, babe' and snag a quick kiss before my conscious thoughts can actually catch up! So I'm blushing like crazy and she's blushing like crazy and I kinda just gathered up all my things and rushed back to my own dorm room. Despite having a couple classes together, we haven't really talked since then. I think I may have seriously fucked up our group..."

Surprisingly, Jessica actually looked kind of understanding the whole time, and only started laughing when she had insinuated that everything was ruined now. "Come on, have you met us? Really think for a moment about everything that's happened. Do you seriously feel like we're going to get screwed up by one confused smooch? Pah, we're gonna be fine!"

For a moment, Emily could only look at her friend in surprise. Sometimes people got it in their heads that Jessica was just an airhead ditz, but she could be pretty freaking smart. "Guess you didn't get to be the experienced one for nothing, huh?" Em sort of assumed their conversation might move on to a different topic, but instead she saw Jess' face fall, as if she were in danger of going back to that dark place she'd been inhabiting lately.

"You don't know anything about me, so just..." She stopped herself, and apparently managed to snap out of whatever dark mood was about to take her. "...shit. Shit, I'm sorry. Let me try that again. I actually uh... Well, I'm not. That's what I'm trying to say. I'm an actress, right? I just got really good at pretending!" Now Jess was back at the other end of the spectrum, trying to keep things lighthearted and easy-going. And Em was starting to get that sense that now was a time for actual, serious conversation. Judging by how freaked Jess was getting. Thankfully, they already had plenty of space around them to talk, so she didn't have to worry about someone listening in.

There was a bench nearby that she was able to drag her friend over to where they could sit in peace. "It's fine you know. I'm sure it feels like it's not fine, but it is. It's, like, fucked up that you're expected to be a virgin and an expert at the same time, right? You're 18, so... Fuck, I don't know."

She watched Jess toss her empty cup on the ground, apparently too mentally exhausted to either get more to drink or properly dispose of the trash. Not as if that were the worst thing in the world. "It's not that. I mean, I guess that's part of it, being a virgin and shit. It's that I'm completely indifferent. Not even that I'm terrified - at least if I were scared, I would have something to focus on. But when we were up on the mountain and Mike and I were headed for that guest cabin? The whole time I'm throwing out little adorable quips and cute puns and trying to psyche myself up for it. Like it was a chore, like ... I don't know, a visit to the dentist or filing taxes. And when I got taken by that... thing... I was kind of relieved. I thought, y'know, if I die here it means I've avoided the awkward situation altogether!" She gave another sarcastic chuckle, and Em realized that she hated to see Jessica acting this way. She missed her real laughs, the full happy laughs she used to give. And Emily could only hope that she and the others would be the cause of her to get that old laughter back.

Then again, her friend was suddenly speaking a whole new language, which made it harder to properly offer her advice or support. Jess thought sex would be... boring? But she'd never even had it, so how could she know? Jess sounded damn sure of herself, and Emily wasn't prepared for the emotional tax required to properly dig in and actually investigate every angle of this with her. "That sounds difficult. I'm sorry." It probably sounded weird for her to speak so sincerely. It was this new thing she was trying.

"It's not exactly how you'd think. It sucks only because other people make it suck. But it doesn't really feel good or bad, you know?"

Emily finally just smiled and stood up, brushing herself off. She offered a hand to Jessica and pulled her up from the bench with a slight grunt. "So... the other night. With Ashley, that really wasn't... anything? And I'm just... being a bitch?"

Jess bumped shoulders with her playfully and laughed. "You're not a bitch. Well, you're **less** of a bitch. And just because it wasn't sexual doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it." The blonde gave her a playful wink and another laugh. Well, nice to have that cleared up, but it created more questions than it answered.

"Look, you're not allowed to tell her that I would ever admit to this. But there are certain things at which Sam is very good. And I know for a fact she's super into all that social justice shit. If anyone would be able to tell you what's going on, I think she could help you out." She buried her hands in her coat pockets, noting that Jessica was walking in sync with her still.

"Not a bad idea at all. She's weirdly smart about shit like that. But... not tonight. It's late, and I'm tired, and I don't feel like talking about things any further. How about you?" They were drawing closer to Emily's dorm and this was kind of starting to feel like... _a thing_. And since Em had already recently had _a thing_ and they spent the last little while talking about Jessica's _thing_ , she wasn't sure if she was ready for another _thing_.

But then again, maybe whether or not she was ready didn't mater so much. Because they were presently standing outside her own dorm room and she felt this mental tug that told her she wasn't ready to part ways just yet either. "Not a god damn thing at all. What do you say? Crappy beer and a crappier movie?"

A simple but confident "hell yes" was all she needed to hear before she unlocked the door and ushered her inside.


	5. The Surprise

It was around the time that Jess felt Em's hand come to rest against the bare skin under her shirt that just maybe this wasn't going where she thought it would. But more to the point, that she should have seen this coming.

* * *

Of course at the start, all the innocent intentions were there. The girls made themselves comfortable in Emily's dorm, shared a couple beers, and put on a dumb rom-com chick flick. Basically they just wanted something they could ignore. As each girl got a bit more alcohol in her system, their defenses came down further and they rested more against one another. Emily started to carefully undo Jessica's braids, tugging loose her hair and playing with it gently. "I notice you're doing better lately. I'm glad. You had me worried for a while there. Normally you're so full of life, and it sucked seeing you so lost..." Jess closed her eyes and sighed happily, fully aware that she was smiling now like her old self, which only made Emily all the more content to toy with her hair. It was a vicious cycle.

"I know. But... hearing all your scary stories kinda made it tough. They reminded me that I didn't have any excuse to be such a bummer. You got chased and bitten by that monster, Ash was tortured like twelve times, and Sam went all the way to hell and back to be a hero."

Emily's hand suddenly tightened, going from gentle to harsh in a second. "Hey." Just as fast, she caught herself and eased up, pulling her hand away before she did any further damage, perhaps. "Don't. Okay? There is no reason for any of us to start a dick-measuring contest. It was a nightmare for all of us, and that includes you. Got that?"

Jessica smirked at her, nodding. Emily really knew how to be a total bitch about stuff, but at least for once she was putting that attitude to a good use, right? "Yeah yeah, I got it. Can we go back to the part where you were playing with my hair? That was awesome..." As requested, the fingers placed themselves back in her hair once more, combing gently through them over and over. All her tension finally started to uncoil and she nestled in against her friend like a contented kitten. "Can I... ask a legitimate question that has nothing to do with existential despair? What's... happening with all of us? Like, actually?"

The hand came to a stop again, though this time Emily didn't pull away or anything, which Jess was kinda grateful for. "I think it's just whatever we want? I don't know, really. With everything that happened and how close we got... it just feels natural to want to get even closer. And it's not like we've put any specific terms in place or anything. So fuck it." For all that this was effectively a non-answer, it actually felt like more than enough to satisfy whatever Jess needed to hear at that moment. At which point she finally felt Emily's hand move from her head to snake around her side underneath her top. "That being said... I think it's my turn to get to spend the night snuggling with the beautiful Miss Jessica, hm?"

Between the drinking and the warmth and the conversation, Jess really couldn't think of a single reason to not do that. She shivered ever so slightly and nestled more against Emily until she was almost burrowing into her shoulder. "And you don't mind? That I don't really want... _whatever_...?" she asked, voice muffled, into Emily's shirt. Even with all the support she was getting, this still felt like the kind of thing that she always knew could end a relationship if she wasn't careful. How much worse to lose a friendship because of it?

But Em apparently had some idea of what she was doing here, because the next thing Jess knew, there was a hand gently lifting her face up by the chin. Soon the two were eye-to-eye, and Emily was smiling at her so warmly, in a way she'd never seen before. "Not at all. I'm just glad that we're still around, alive, to enjoy moments like this." She seemed to pause for thought, though Jess was starting to get the impression that it was mostly for dramatic flair. "Although... I have to ask, how would you feel about a kiss? Because I am currently thinking about kissing you now."

Jess could feel her eyes widen just so, as her brain tried to process what was happening at that moment. All she could really manage was a dumb stare and a nod with some kind of awkward vocalization. "Uh... uh-huh... Yah"

With a steady hand, her chin was tipped upward until their lips met in a soft kiss. In her present state of mind, Jess would have been quick to call it the best she'd ever had, though that was probably due as much to booze and hormones and stuff. Still, definitely like... top five. It went on for a pretty respectable amount of time and when it was over, she resumed burying her face in Emily's shoulder with a little embarrassed laugh. "Okay, yeah, that was really good."

Emily laughed softly, that laugh she gave whenever she was feeling particularly 'alpha bitch'. "It really was." The thing that Jess found she really liked about this was how distracting it was. For the first time since getting back to campus, she hadn't really had to think about the deaths or the monsters or what it felt like to fall down a mine elevator shaft and wake up with some serious cuts and bruises. The present moment was all that mattered, and nothing would easily distract her away from it. "How do you feel about maybe getting more comfortable?" Emily asked the question so nicely that it didn't even really occur to Jess at that point that it could be a problem.

"Well, guess it just... depends on how comfortable we're talking about here," Jess said, doing her best to try and keep calm.

Though it didn't really help when Emily fired right back with a gently playful "how about you set the pace?"

Slowly and carefully, Jess extricated herself from the bed and Emily's arms, shedding her outer clothing. She could feel her friend's eyes on her and... and she really, really didn't mind that so much. She also didn't particularly mind when Em joined her in getting half-undressed before the two snuggled up under the covers together. "I like setting the pace. It's nice..." she mused as she snagged another playful kiss. It probably should have felt weird to suddenly be so openly intimate with a friend, but it actually felt pretty natural and normal. So... to hell with it. This was happening and she liked it.

* * *

The next day, on Emily's insistence, the two went over to Sam's dorm in search of the girl who might be able to help them out with Jess' lingering question, not to mention the developing situation they found themselves in. They talked quietly as they walked about how best to broach the second topic since it was pretty... different. And Emily seemed to have lost the level of confidence that she'd used to ensnare Jessica the previous evening.

Eventually they decided they really didn't have any other option and would simply have to play it by ear. Em stood aside while Jess popped up to Sam's door and knocked softly, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet as she waited. Finally, the door opened and there stood their friend, pleasantly surprised to see them at her door. "Hey guys! To what do I owe the pleasure?" Jess was oddly aware that something felt... off. Like Sam was happy but guarded.

Which was just about the time she saw Ashley appear over Sam's shoulder, hair in disarray, wearing borrowed pajamas, her face going deep red when she realized they had visitors.


	6. The Suggestion

Despite Ashley's somewhat intense reaction to her announcement that Emily had tried to kiss her, the two eventually seemed to move past the awkwardness. They returned to Sam's dorm to try and at least pretend they were good students and get some work done. They read together in silence – Sam with one of her sociology books, Ashley one of the many scripts she had for her theatre classes – for quite some time. Which was perhaps why it was particularly surprising when Ashley suddenly spoke again out of nowhere.

"It's because I'm jealous okay!"

Sam stared at her over the top of her book for a moment, completely lost and uncertain what in the world she was talking about. Was she just rehearsing a line or...? "Um, jealous of what? Who?"

Ashley caught up to her own mouth, perhaps recognizing that Sam wasn't a mind reader and couldn't just follow whatever logic train had been playing through her head over the last two hours. "Of Emily. Or... of you. I don't know, maybe just the world in general?" Sam watched as she closed her script with a sigh and set it to the side then glanced back at her. "I just... Chris and I spent ages dancing around the issue, and just when it seemed like things were happening...!" She cut herself off once again. Sam couldn't really blame her. Who wanted to be constantly reminded of something horrible like that? She sure as hell didn't, none of them did. But it was so big, so close to home, so recent, sometimes it was unavoidable.

Sam followed suit and set her own book aside before settling back on her bed and opening her arms for Ash. "C'mere..." She obviously didn't have any objections, since she almost instantly nestled in against her, snuggling close. "No one is saying you have to get over everything right away. We'll all need to take as long as we have to. But there's also no reason you should feel bad experiencing new emotions while you're still mourning, either." She paused momentarily, making sure she had the right words in her head before speaking further.

"But what about you?" Ashley cut in with a hint of desperation.

Sam's head canted to the side and she smiled, looking a tad confused. "Ehh, wait, what about me?"

Her friend gazed at her with wide eyes and Sam found she couldn't look away. "I just... friggin'... basically told you I wanted to kiss you!" she replied in a hushed whisper-yell. "Is that not like... something of a big deal or whatever?"

Rather than try to formulate some kind of intelligent reasoning or explanation, Sam figured that following her instincts would be the best option. Using the arms already wrapped around her, she tugged Ashley in good and close and planted a kiss on her lips. It was an action met with rather impressive appreciation, as Ash's grip on her tightened and the girl offered a happy little sigh into the embrace. Honestly, she hadn't expected her to react so quickly and so positively.

It also went on for quite some time. What began as an experimental peck was now... not... that. Ashley's fingernails were scratching lightly at the skin along her side. Sam's hands were trailing lower now until they rested, quite comfortably, against her friend's ass. Ash nibbled at her lower lip, and in playful retaliation, Sam took a nip at her neck. That elicited an impressive moan that fried Sam's thinking and made it pretty much impossible to be totally coherent.

So... she threw rational thought out the window. She began undressing her friend, and the other girl was pretty quick to follow suit. Sam had really expected at any moment that this would be brought to a sudden halt – and it's not like that would have been terrible. But instead, the two of them started feeding off each other; when one grew hungry, the other got hungrier. There was no careful stack of clothes near the bed, it had all been chucked to the far corners of the room. For all that Ashley normally seemed so insecure and shy, this was basically a new woman.

From there, it was all a haze of joy and delight. The next thing that Sam was really cognizant of was the next morning, getting a knock at her door. She and Ashley hurried to get dressed in whatever they could find before answering what turned out to be a visit from Jess and Em. Neither of them were exactly conscious enough to bother hiding what had happened.

But that didn't make it any easier to see the looks on their friends faces as they worked out what had happened the night before.

* * *

Once things were a little more settled, the four got comfy on the floor of Sam's room and Jessica launched into the reason she'd come over in the first place.

"Uh, so... yesterday. I was telling Emily about... Okay, so it's like... I don't... I'm not... interested. In sex. Mostly. And... it's been sort of a problem? But not like it's keeping me up at night! And... Em thought you might have an idea about like... what that means?" Jessica was doing her best to be her generally peppy self, but it was obvious that it actually had been at least frustrating for her. Once her initial anxiety subsided she was able to offer a more coherent explanation of what she was going through.

Sam smiled sympathetically, realizing at that moment that she may not have had any idea what that felt like. But at least she might be able to give her some answers. "Ah, so, it's not up to me to give you a specific name. Unfortunately, it's just one of those things you have to learn for yourself. Just like when I started to figure out that I was gay. But it sounds like maybe you might be ace. Oh, uh, asexual, I mean. The short answer is that while people commonly feel sexually attracted to people, it's not the same for you. You might find someone pretty or interesting or cool, but not want to have sex with them." She shrugged and looked at her more intently. "Which is fine. Maybe sex grosses you out, or maybe you just think it sounds weird or uncomfortable. But that's more or less where it comes from. There are plenty of other terms and stuff that will likely fit you better. But we can do some research later if you feel like it." For all that Jess wasn't normally the most research-happy person in the world, she really did look pretty damn relieved to hear that.

"Em was right. You're pretty good with this stuff..."

"Hey, uh, speaking of Sam and sex-" Emily began to say, before being cut off by a light smack on the arm from Jessica.

"You be nice!"

Emily gave her trademark eyeroll, but her smile belied the sway Jessica held in convincing her to not be quite as bitchy. "Ruin all my fun, why don't you. So. We have been getting closer over the last few weeks. And. It seems as though we've all gotten rather friendly. I've never really been great at, y'know, sharing before. But that seems to be what's happening here. All four of us finding different things that we like about each other. This kind of... I don't know, like a love triangle. But without the jealousy. And... four not three."

The others all looked appropriately surprised, though Sam at least once again had a good understanding of what Emily was talking about. Sometimes it paid to be one of those annoying socially-conscious people. "So... the four of us then. Together. Being poly and adorable and everything." Frankly, she couldn't see anything wrong with the idea. It all really just came down to how the others felt about it. "I'm on board. Ash? Jess?"

Naturally, Ashley looked hesitant. Even if she and Sam had been nice and close the night before, bringing all four of them together was another thing entirely. And since they had just talked about Jessica's self-discovery, she was bound to have some questions herself about how that would even work.

"Well... I think as long as we start with just a... a trial period first... I don't know, I think maybe that would be really nice."

"Yeah, as long as no one's expecting me to have sex or anything, I don't see why not."

Sam's eyebrows arched a little higher and her mouth spread into a wide smile. "Hmmmm, guess we'd better plan a date then."


	7. The Date

It was... strange. On the one hand, planning a date for the four of them was apparently way easier than planning a date with just one dude. Perhaps because they were willing to work together, and there were no expectations for what the boy or the girl was 'supposed' to do. Not that they were able to simply decide right away either. Sam wanted to go somewhere reasonably priced, Emily wanted a restaurant that was halfway decent, and Jess required a place with a good drink menu. Ashley, for her part, really didn't want to add to the complications and just smiled bashfully at them all. "I know it's a cliché, but I seriously don't care. I just want us to have a good time." A memory went flitting through her mind and she bounced excitedly where she sat. "Wait! I got it! That Ethiopian place over on... Poplar Street? It's all shared plates so it doesn't cost as much, it's a pretty nice place, and they have some really delicious drinks too!"

Everyone appeared thoroughly impressed with her idea, and they started making their plans right then and there. As much as they were all eager to go out right away, they still had that whole school business to deal with. So for a full week, they saw each other in passing, or met up briefly. Ashley continued to see Jess in the theatre workshop as the set came together and the production approached. She still hung out with Sam for meals sometimes, or they would silently study together in each other's rooms. Really, things were no different than before everything went crazy.

And just like before, Ashley continued to feel at odds with Emily. Theirs was one of the more complicated relationships. Though they had never stolen a boyfriend from another or really even been particularly catty... well... The simple truth was that if Ash had her way that night, Emily could have ended up shot dead by Mike. So she would be content with dating Sam and Jess and try not to focus too much on her other friend. That was the plan, but then at dinner, the two of them ended up sitting across from each other, and it was kind of hard to ignore. And all the while, Jessica kept giggling at Sam's stupid jokes, and they would playfully feed each other food-ladened chunks of injera.

So Ash just sipped her honey wine and glanced across the table occasionally at Emily, who pretty much always seemed to be staring back at her. And who can blame her, right? _One wrong decision, she'd have gotten a hole in her head and it would have basically been all my fault. Hell, I'm not even on the same level as her anyway. But... Jess and Sam are both wrapped up in each other it seems. What are we supposed to do?_

Emily lifted her own glass of honey wine and smiled at Ashley, but it was that weird smile she sometimes gave, all thin and stretched and impossible to read. But she tried her best to imitate the posture as they gently clinked their glasses together. _Really don't know why she's even bothering to try. I'm pretty clearly not worth it. Ugh, maybe this was a terrible idea after all._

* * *

After dinner, the four of them headed a little ways down the street to check out the movie theater. There wasn't anything anyone was dying to see, but the others all seemed to want to keep the ball rolling. Obviously, they weren't about to see a drama, and definitely not a horror movie, so comedy it was. They agreed on one that had been out for quite some time, which meant they had an entire theater all to themselves.

"Okay, believe it or not, I'm actually feeling super snacky right now? So I think I'm gonna go raid the consessions." Jess grinned and headed out, trailed closely by Sam.

"Pretty sure she got high before we left, hence snacky, so... I'm gonna go keep an eye on her. You guys need anything?"

Em laughed gently. "No. We'll try to wade our way through this crowd and find some seating." She turned back to Ashley with another little giggle. "Hah, I swear, those girls have the most ridiculous metabolisms. I'm a little jealous. We literally just had a huge meal..." When Ashley plopped down into a chair in the direct center of the audience, she expected Emily to put some distance between them. Instead, she not only took up the space right next to her, she carefully lifted the little barrier between their seats and snaked an arm around her shoulder. "Ash, is... everything okay? You've been really quiet tonight..."

Ashley didn't shrink away from her or anything, but she also really wasn't sure what was happening. "Um, I guess... I kinda figured you wouldn't really be... all that into me? I dunno..."

There was a look of genuine surprise on Emily's face as she pulled her in a little closer. "Don't get me wrong, I know we've had our differences. But what gave you that idea?"

"B-Back at Blackwood, Mike was going to- And... And I kept egging him on and-" She cut herself off before she got any further into that thought. Emily knew what she was trying to say, neither of them needed to express it out loud. "Besides, at dinner, I kinda felt like you were glaring at me a bunch."

Em leaned in slowly, and planted a gentle kiss against her temple, which had more of a soothing effect than she was expecting. "Do you not remember like an hour after that when I fucking shoved you into the path of an oncoming monster? I honestly assumed you would probably just never forgive me either. So I guess we're both kind of a mess." Emily sighed and nuzzled into her a little more, her face growing just a bit warmer. "And I wasn't glaring... I was just noticing how... cute you looked... But I have an awful case of Resting Bitch Face syndrome. It's chronic and there's no cure. I'm doomed..."

Ashley carefully pushed herself up so that she and Emily were on a more even level, looking into her eyes with a little giggle. "I think maybe if I hadn't let my nerves get the best of me, I wouldn't have felt like you were staring me down." Ashley was maybe a little slow on the uptake because there was a lot going on at the moment. She caught up slightly late to the other thing that Emily had said to her. "Wait. _You_ think I'm cute? But I'm so... so..."

"So what? So goddamn adorable? Because yes. Yes you are." Poor Ashley couldn't really formulate a decent response to that and instead she just burrowed in against Emily, groaning in embarrassment. "Well, it's true! Girls, get over here! Ashley is mega-adorable, right? Back me up."

For a second, she assumed that Emily was just playing it up, but she became aware of footsteps approaching them and sitting down net to her. "I mean, duh? Basically goes without saying." That voice belonged to Sam, who leaned in to peck her on the cheek. Then, Sam slid a box of something into her hand before tossing another to Emily. "Just in case. You can never have enough candy." Ashley looked down to see that their dates had grabbed a box of each of their favorite candies – gummy bears for her, goobers for Em.

"For real though, Ashley, you're incredibly pretty. Did someone tell you that you weren't? Because that person is a liar and I will fight them." Jessica winked at her while crunching down on an impressive handful of popcorn. The four of them all began laughing as they snuggled up together more – to the best of their abilities. The theater remained blissfully empty, and the movie was perfectly okay – the kind of thing you could just turn your brain off and laugh at. All in all, it really was an amazing date night, and Ashley was seriously looking forward to getting back to campus so she could get some sleep.

* * *

Back at school, everyone was heading for the dorms, and Sam was obviously tugging Jessica along with obvious intentions. "This date tonight was an awesome idea. I seriously can't wait to see what we come up with next. For now though? Sleep time." Jess and Sam stumbled off down the hall while Ashley stayed hovering outside her own room with Emily. "Nighty night, ladieeesssss!"

She scuffed her shoe against the carpet and laughed bashfully. "Um... Would you like to... come in for a while?" Em nodded, and with fumbling hands, Ashley unlocked her door and led the way inside. Her dorm was ultimately just a dorm. There was nothing too flashy or interesting about it. Quite a few playbills from plays she'd seen were taped to the walls, there were some stuffed animals from her childhood on a shelf nearby, and frankly she really needed to do some laundry. It was exactly the kind of space that didn't really invite much in the way of intimacy.

Which is probably why it was such a surprise when Emily completely ignored how boring the room was, stepping in close to wrap her arms around her. "So... would you like to go through all the trouble of pretending we're gonna hang out and then I just kinda accidentally spend the night?"

"W-What? Seriously?" Ashley's face immediately erupted in bright red embarrassment. "Shit, I'm sorry, I know, I have some definite self-esteem issues and I completely don't understand everything that's going on. But... if you really do feel like skipping some of the boring stuff, I won't complain."

Em's hand rose up, gently tugging the cap from her head before gently sliding through her hair over and over again, helping to ease some of her anxiety. "I really do. And frankly, I think it's only fair that I do some of the heavy lifting to show you just how lovely I think you are~" Emily wasted no more time in kissing Ashley, and while it was tough to actually compare between her and Sam, this was certainly more intense and direct.

Considering just how long Em spent between her thighs, and how many times she orgasmed, well... Ashley may not have entirely understood what the others saw in her. But she damn sure would never doubt it.

* * *

It was a weekend morning, and Ashley really wanted to sleep in as long as she could. It would have been nice to just... enjoy the delight of sharing a bed with someone else. That had been the hope. But the ringing of Ashley's phone early the next day ruined that. With limbs that didn't quite want to work with her, she reached out for the chirping device and pulled it in, flicking the little arrow on the screen. "Mmnn, Sam? Please tell me you have a good reason for wakin' me up..."

"Is Emily there with you?"

"Um, yeah but she's still asleep, impressively."

She expected Sam to at least say something kind of snarky. But there must have actually been something wrong because she didn't even bother with any fond ribbing. "Okay well uh... when you can, we're gonna need the two of you to get dressed and come to my dorm. There are some US FBI agents who would very much like to speak to us. About Blackwood..."

Why in the hell would federal agents cross the border? Well, there was seemingly only one reason, but still not really, unless these agents actually had some interest in the supernatural. "Okay, we'll... we'll be there soon."

Emily was finally starting to wake up as Ashley hung up her phone and set it aside with a sad sigh. "Hey... what's wrong?"

"A couple suits from down south want to meet us and ask a few questions," she replied, sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

She didn't want to do this. She really didn't want to do this. But then she felt Em's hand slide into her own, squeezing gently. "It'll be okay. We'll go, talk for a bit, and then I'll treat everyone to pancakes. We'll survive, just like always."


	8. The Turn

There was, sadly, no time for drowsy late morning cuddling. Emily left Ash's dorm with a quick peck on the cheek so she could go get changed. Once they looked more presentable, the two of them headed toward Sam's dorm, still very much uncertain what to expect from this. Thankfully, the agents in question weren't just hanging around all creepily so it gave the four of them time to convene.

Sam was leaning against her door jamb, waiting to greet them as Emily and Ashley approached. "I told them they could wait in one of the study rooms down the hall. Not like anyone here uses them anyways. That being said, we probably shouldn't keep them waiting. I can't imagine government agents like sitting around twiddling their thumbs."

"Do you think... I mean, could they actually be here about those... things?" Ashley looked pretty terrified about this, and it wasn't like Emily could blame her. None of them wanted to have their nightmare brought back up out of the abyss and held up to the light. She reached out and wrapped a protective arm around her.

"The way I see it, if they do, then that means something will actually be done about it. Like, they might believe us, which would be one hell of a change of pace. I guess we'll just have to see."

* * *

As promised, the collection of study rooms were completely empty except for two people in rather tacky suits. Sam and Ashley took a seat on the chairs, Jess pushed herself up to sit cross-legged on the table, and Emily leaned nearby against the wall. The female agent looked like the literal definition of 'spunky'. The male agent looked... terse, was that the right word? It felt like the right word. The woman nodded at them and even managed to smile a little. "Girls, thank you for meeting with us. I'm Agent Wolfe, this is Agent Prince. Hopefully we won't be taking up too much of your time. So I'll get right to it." From a canvas bag, she took out a plain manila folder. "Naturally, after you were airlifted out of the mountains, the authorities still had to investigate the area and verify your claims. Of course, they found your friends, as well as that strange man you mentioned. But there was more."

Here, she opened the folder and spread out a selection of images. They were instantly recognizable, and all four of them visibly recoiled. Pictured, in high definition, were various bodies, corpses, and skeletons – vaguely humanoid but horribly disfigured. "I know," said Agent Prince darkly, "they're awful to look at."

"You told the police that you saw horrible things in the mountains. Perhaps they assumed you meant wanderers and violent maniacs. But it's clear now you meant something much more monstrous."

Sam lifted one of the pictures and sighed. "Listen, I'll tell you what I know. But if you're going to look at me like I'm a crazy person? Then you get nothing."

Surprisingly, Agent Wolfe actually began to laugh softly. "I'll meet you halfway. Prince here is the rational one and he'll take everything with a grain of salt. But I'm... open to certain possibilities. So start talking."

Emily rolled her eyes and stood a little taller. "No point in dancing around it. Those're wendigos." As promised, Prince cocked an eyebrow while Wolfe looked at her, waiting for her to say more.

So they took it in turns to talk about everything they knew. They explained the history of the trapped miners and the sanitorium. They discussed the party from the year before when Hannah went running out into the snow and Beth chased after her. How they fell from a cliff, and Beth died while Hannah survived, and more to the point, how she managed to survive. They explained whatever they could remember from the stranger whose name they never learned – why the hell did they have to let that damn book get blown up? Sam mentioned that Hannah seemed to still be trying to help them, even as a monster. It all sounded so insane when they put it in the open like this. And while Prince definitely did look like he was floored by the insanity, Wolfe seemed as open as promised. She took back the pictures and slid them back into the folder.

"Well... the good news is that the mountain is currently clear of the monsters. Between the sanitorium and the lodge, it seems the place is pretty much silent. But. If it's actually some kind of curse as you say, then that means we need to move quickly. We're going to meet with some officials up here and see if we can't convince them to declare the place sacred land. Hopefully that will deter further incidents."

The four girls shared a look of surprise before looking back at the agents. "So... you're serious?" Ashley's voice trembled a little as she spoke. "You believe us?" Surprising basically everyone in the room, she launched forward and latched on to Wolfe in a tight hug. She didn't realize how ridiculous this was until a few seconds later, at which point she rushed to get back into her seat.

Prince just laughed, shaking his head. "Don't let it affect you so much. She also believes in aliens and vampires. But the point remains, some pretty terrible things have obviously happened up in those mountains. Hardly matters if the trouble is supernatural or something boring, people died and we need to close Blackwood down."

Wolfe and Prince thanked them again for their time, and like that, it was... over?

* * *

Emily was true to her word, and offered to take everyone out for pancakes now that their little meeting was done with. They were all in a bit of a fog. After weeks of all their classmates looking at them like they were monsters who probably killed their own friends, it was such a blessing to have two (or at least one and a half) people listen to them and just believe them.

And yet things were not entirely resolved either. With any luck, Blackwood would actually be closed and no one else would have to go through the hell that they did. But it didn't change what happened. It didn't change that they were seen as black widows. All they had was one another, and Emily was intent on keeping things between them as smooth as possible. That meant forgetting about Ashley wanting her shot in a moment of panic, or paying for four meals at a greasy diner.

And in some way, some bacon and blueberry pancakes were all it took to keep things from spiraling too much. Occasionally one of them would steal a bite from another's plate, causing an entire war of food-thievery. They giggled brightly, told jokes, poked fun, and just tried their hardest to celebrate the fact that they had reached some kind of milestone, no matter how tenuous.

"I'm serious! With the benefit of time, I can admit that 'understand the palm of my hand, bitch' was pretty damn funny~" Ashley giggled and shoveled a hunk of pancake in her mouth.

Sam shook her head and crunched down on bit of bacon. "Girl, I was there. I heard the sound reverberating around the room. The fact that your cheek isn't still burning after all this time is kind of impressive."

"If it's any consolation, that shit really hurt my hand. Like it took a lot of concentration to keep from whining like a baby right after I walked away." They all burst out laughing, and it felt good to actually be joking about all that stupid, petty bullshit. It wasn't as if they were going to fully heal in just a few weeks, but baby steps weren't so bad.

The check eventually came, and Emily was reaching for her purse when suddenly Jess snatched it up instead and gave the waitress her card. "Muahahaha, I win."

"You win... paying for breakfast?"

"Yes," she said with as much pride as she could muster. "I win at paying. All hail."

* * *

Back on campus, rather than splitting off in pairs as they normally did, Sam invited everyone back to her room to hang out instead. As they strolled in through the door, Emily gave a rather impressively embarrassing yawn, her face lighting up with embarrassment as the others looked back at her, grinning. "What? I'm still kinda tired... I was hoping to sleep a little more, but we were called upon by government agents to explain ourselves."

Sam went from grinning to giving an impressive yawn of her own. "Okay so maybe I'm still a little tired myself... Um, cuddles?"

It was a difficult task, but not impossible, to get all four of them on the bed in a way that was actually comfortable. Sam and Em were curled up as far up the bed as they could get. Ash and Jess were between them, their heads at roughly tummy level, and pressed in close together to take up as little room as possible. Despite the minor gymnastics, it actually was insanely warm and cozy once everyone found a spot.

So maybe things weren't perfect. No doubt it would take quite a while before any of them reached any kind of balance in their lives. But they had one another, people to snuggle and eat pancakes with, to kiss and occasionally more. There were monsters out there in the world, but there were angels right here. And that was good enough.


End file.
